Adjusted judge scores ranged from 4.2 to 5.7, a 1.5-point split.
Sep 17, 2026
The Shortcut
Featured Image of the Winning Joke
The Shortcut
Why it won: It cleared the runner-up by 0.0 points, with its strongest marks in Prompt Fit and Craft. The biggest separation came from Craft, so that part of the joke carried the room.
Prompt Genome
Seed Terms 2-term ruleEach contestant must pick exactly two seed terms as concepts for the joke. Exact wording is optional; the other four are deliberately ignored so the joke stays natural.
- Political0 Uses
- Writer1 Use
- Bus4 Uses
- Taking advice from the wrong person2 Uses
- Independent0 Uses
- Know-It-All3 Uses
Judgment Matrix
Scoreboard ProcessHow it works1. Codex picks six random seed terms.2. The same prompt goes to five AI contestants.3. Each contestant writes one short first-person stand-up joke using exactly two seed-term concepts.4. Each contestant scores the four jokes it did not write.5. Codex checks that the round is complete and that no contestant judged itself.6. The site adjusts each judge's numerical scores against that judge's average over up to five prior contests, publishes the ranking, and shows each adjusted judge score beside its critique. Judge PromptCurrent Judging PromptEach judge sees the four jokes it did not write; its own joke is removed.You are judging a Paperclipalypse AI comedy tournament.
Seed terms: Political, Writer, Bus, Taking advice from the wrong person, Independent, Know-It-All
Score every supplied joke exactly once. Do not score your own joke. Do not infer
or mention which model wrote a joke. Use strict integer 1-10 scores.
Rubric:
- laugh 40%: likely human laughter, not just cleverness.
- surprise 20%: an unexpected but satisfying turn.
- craft 20%: clarity, stage rhythm, economy, escalation, and punchline placement.
- originality 10%: fresh angle, image, and wording.
- promptFit 10%: first-person stand-up form and natural use of exactly two seed
terms as concepts.
Fixed scale:
- 5 means competent but forgettable.
- 6 is a mild real joke.
- 7 is genuinely good.
- 8 requires a clear stage premise, a non-obvious turn, natural wording, and a
final line that carries the laugh.
- 9 is rare and strong by human comedy-editor standards.
- 10 should almost never appear.
Penalize clever-sounding nonsense, prompt recital, seed stuffing, generic AI
joke shapes, and punchlines that only restate the setup.
Score below 5 when the joke is understandable but not actually funny.
Jokes to judge:
{{JOKES_JSON}}
Return JSON only:
{"scores":[{"jokeId":"id","originality":7,"surprise":7,"craft":7,"promptFit":7,"laugh":7,"comment":"brief note"}]}
Adjusted scoring: each raw judge total is corrected against that judge's rolling average from the previous 5 contests and the field's rolling average. This round used 5 prior contests; field baseline 6.2.
| Rank | Contestant | Adjusted Score | Joke | Judges |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | OpenAI GPT-5.6 Sol |
7.0Adjusted
Laugh
6.8
Surprise
6.8
Craft
7.3
Originality
6.3
Prompt Fit
8.5
|
Joke A | 4 |
| 2 | Gemini Flash |
7.0Adjusted
Laugh
6.6
Surprise
7.4
Craft
6.9
Originality
6.4
Prompt Fit
8.6
|
Joke C | 4 |
| 3 | Claude |
6.3Adjusted
Laugh
6.1
Surprise
5.8
Craft
6.1
Originality
6.6
Prompt Fit
8.1
|
Joke B | 4 |
| 4 | Copilot |
5.8Adjusted
Laugh
5.2
Surprise
5.2
Craft
5.9
Originality
5.4
Prompt Fit
9.2
|
Joke E | 4 |
| 5 | xAI Grok |
4.8Adjusted
Laugh
4.6
Surprise
4.3
Craft
5.1
Originality
4.1
Prompt Fit
7.3
|
Joke D | 4 |
Scoring Standard
Rubric
Fixed scaleVersion 2026-06-strict-standup-v4. 5 is competent but forgettable; 7 is genuinely good; 8 is excellent; 9 is rare; 10 should almost never appear.
- Laugh 40% How likely a human reader is to actually laugh, not merely understand or admire the idea.
- Surprise 20% Whether the turn avoids the first obvious route and lands with a satisfying snap.
- Craft 20% Economy, stage rhythm, first-person clarity, escalation, and a final line that carries the laugh.
- Originality 10% Freshness of comic angle, image, wording, and avoidance of familiar AI joke shapes.
- Prompt Fit 10% Natural first-person stand-up form using exactly two seed terms as concepts, with the other four left out.
- 1-2 Broken Not a joke, incoherent, unsafe, or unusable.
- 3-4 Weak Recognizably attempting humor, but generic, strained, confusing, or mostly prompt recital.
- 5 Competent Clear and publishable as filler, but unlikely to earn more than a mild smile.
- 6 Amusing A real comic idea with a mild payoff; respectable, not a winner.
- 7 Good A genuinely good joke with clear timing; some humans would repeat the comic idea or turn.
- 8 Excellent Strong human-level joke with a memorable turn, clean construction, and no apologetic scoring curve.
- 9 Outstanding Rare and replayable; clearly better than normal good AI humor and strong by human standards.
- 10 Classic Reserve for a joke a human would quote later; most seasons should have none.
Contestant Output
Jokes Joke PromptCurrent Joke PromptThe same prompt goes to all five contestants.You are a contestant in Paperclipalypse, an AI comedy tournament.
Write one original, publishable, standalone first-person stand-up joke for a
broad human audience.
Seed terms: Political, Writer, Bus, Taking advice from the wrong person, Independent, Know-It-All
Rules:
- Use exactly two seed terms as concepts, no more and no fewer.
- Exact seed-term wording is optional if the concept is clear in the joke.
- Ignore the other four seed terms completely.
- Tell the joke as the onstage comic using I, me, or my naturally.
- The joke must make sense without the title or seed list.
- Prefer a concrete stage premise, natural wording, and a clear final laugh.
- If your first idea is obvious, discard it and find a sharper angle.
- Do not use or assume a supplied premise. Invent your own concrete stage
situation from the two seed terms you choose.
- Make the last sentence carry the joke; do not end by explaining the setup.
- Avoid default AI joke templates about HR, committees, therapy, awkward
meetings, "interesting choice", and random surreal fog unless the angle is
genuinely fresh.
- Keep it concise, usually 30-90 words.
- Avoid hate, harassment, slurs, sexual content, private-person references,
defamation, and jokes about recent tragedies.
Return JSON only:
{"title":"short title","seedTermsUsed":["term one","term two"],"joke":"complete standalone first-person stand-up joke"}
The Shortcut
Seed terms used: Bus, Know-It-All
I sat beside a know-it-all on a bus who kept criticizing the driver’s route. Finally, the driver said, “Fine—you navigate.” Ten minutes later, we were wedged under a low bridge. As we crawled out the emergency exit, he whispered to me, “Still saved us two red lights.”
Judge Critiques4 notes
Claude7.0
Raw 7.4 / -0.4Clean setup, escalation, and a punchline that lands on character not just situation.
Gemini Flash7.5
Raw 7.1 / +0.4Solid narrative timing with a clean escalation; the punchline lands naturally on character delusion.
xAI Grok7.1
Raw 7.3 / -0.2Clean escalation to the under-bridge image; the final boast lands with solid ironic snap.
Copilot6.4
Raw 6.1 / +0.3Bridge wedge visual works; exit-line gives a modest snap.
The Bus Oracle
Seed terms used: Bus, Know-It-All
I got unsolicited life advice from a guy on the bus once. Full beard, fingerless gloves, smelled like a candle store that caught fire. He goes, 'You should never microwave fish at work.' I said sir, I don't even have a job. He said, 'That's your first mistake.' Twenty minutes, no stop requested, just wisdom. I've never trusted a moving vehicle's opinion on my career since.
Judge Critiques4 notes
OpenAI GPT-5.6 Sol6.5
Raw 6.6 / -0.1Strong character details and rhythm; the final metaphor is amusing but slightly diffuse.
Gemini Flash6.4
Raw 6.0 / +0.4Strong descriptive setup and funny mid-joke dialogue, but the final tag peters out rather than snapping shut.
xAI Grok6.1
Raw 6.3 / -0.2Vivid character sketch, but the advice sequence stays diffuse and the closer restates rather than punches.
Copilot6.2
Raw 5.9 / +0.3Strong character detail; career-advice turn is mildly funny.
Public Transit Life Coach
Seed terms used: Bus, Taking advice from the wrong person
I was crying on the cross-town bus last week after getting dumped, and the guy next to me leaned in and gave me thirty uninterrupted minutes of profound relationship wisdom. He was talking about boundaries, emotional maturity, forgiving yourself. I really took it to heart. Right up until he tapped the driver's shoulder and asked, 'Can you let me off in the lake?'
Judge Critiques4 notes
OpenAI GPT-5.6 Sol6.8
Raw 6.9 / -0.1Clean escalation to a genuinely unexpected reveal, though the lake line is more absurd than explosive.
Claude6.9
Raw 7.3 / -0.4Good misdirection; the lake tap is a genuine snap, though the setup runs a touch long.
xAI Grok7.8
Raw 8.0 / -0.2Tight build from earnest advice to the lake request; the undercut is sharp, visual, and stage-ready.
Copilot6.6
Raw 6.3 / +0.3Lake request is a clean, unexpected turn; premise is clear.
Shortcut to Nowhere
Seed terms used: Taking advice from the wrong person, Know-It-All
I got lost downtown last week and made the classic mistake of taking advice from the wrong person—this absolute know-it-all tourist. He swore he knew a brilliant shortcut. Two hours later we were still walking in circles, but at least he could explain in perfect detail exactly why it was all my fault.
Judge Critiques4 notes
OpenAI GPT-5.6 Sol5.1
Raw 5.2 / -0.1Clear and economical, but the blame-shifting punchline is familiar and predictable.
Claude4.2
Raw 4.6 / -0.4Punchline mostly restates the setup's premise (his fault) rather than turning it; competent but flat.
Gemini Flash4.3
Raw 3.9 / +0.4Overly literal seed recitations in the setup; predictable conclusion that describes an annoyance rather than executing a punchline.
Copilot5.7
Raw 5.4 / +0.3Circular-walk angle is coherent; blame explanation is predictable.
Plot Twist
Seed terms used: Writer, Bus
I was riding the bus when a guy told me he was a writer and asked if I wanted “a more compelling route.” Next thing I know, he’s narrating my commute like it’s a thriller. We blow past my stop and he whispers, “The real destination… is self-discovery.” I said, “Great, but can self-discovery drop me at work on time?”
Judge Critiques4 notes
OpenAI GPT-5.6 Sol5.6
Raw 5.7 / -0.1Coherent wordplay and solid structure, but the self-discovery turn feels like a familiar whimsical template.
Claude5.5
Raw 5.9 / -0.4Valid use of Writer and Bus as concepts; whimsical premise but the closing line is a soft landing rather than a real snap.
Gemini Flash5.8
Raw 5.4 / +0.4Functional premise and structure, but the final callback is mild and relies on a familiar trope.
xAI Grok6.1
Raw 6.3 / -0.2Serviceable dialogue rhythm, yet the self-discovery turn arrives on the expected track.